A Personal Update on Moving Forward

The past month or so of my life has been crazy, stressful, and heartbreaking. Honestly, the entire past 6 months have been hard on me with one challenge after another and often many at the same time. But the biggest changes came only recently. I wasn’t expecting them. I didn’t want them. I fought so hard to hold onto what I was losing. I believed then and still believe now that this wasn’t a good thing that happened and I do wish it wouldn’t have.

BUT. Some amazing and wonderful lessons were taught to me and I have found a peace and joy I’ve never felt before. I am stronger now and I can truly be thankful to God for letting me break so I would finally turn myself over to him for healing.

I’m still struggling. I’m still sad. I haven’t finished grieving just yet and I’m not sure when I will. But I’m looking forward, not backward, and I truly believe good things await me even if I don’t know what they are yet.


Tone It Up 2016

Hi there! My favorite trainers, Karena & Katrina at Tone It Up, LOVE to challenge women everywhere to dedicate themselves to loving their bodies and getting healthy! A few times a year they roll out themed challenges with new workouts, nutrition guides, giveaways, and more! A year ago I was participating in the Love Your Body challenge, although I quit after a week or two because I was frustrated with how expensive it was to buy healthy foods when I didn’t have a job…. This year, I’m participating in the Tone It Up Challenge!


I’m also working through their book, 28 Days to Fit, Fierce, & Fabulous to tone up my mind and heart along with my body.

It’s Hump Day of week 1 (although it’s not too late to join in if you’re interested) and I feel like posting a mid-week update!

Sunday was meal prep day and goal-setting. I did a good job with goal-setting, not so good with the meal prep because I wasn’t feeling well and I got really tired and needed a nap before I got everything done. I got the hardest parts done though!

My goals for this challenge are:

Be Fit

  • I will learn to rock meal prep Sundays!
  • I will use exercise/yoga to cope with stress and relieve tension
  • I will go completely gluten-free for good!

Be Fierce

  • I will follow through on all my promises
  • I will have the courage to keep going when I’m frustrated
  • I will have the motivation to accomplish my dreams

Be Fabulous

  • I will share my love more freely
  • I will feel more peaceful
  • I will be more forgiving

Day 1 was great, followed the meal plan really well and got both my exercises in! Day 2 was an oopsie since I slept 13 hours and got up pretty late. I did eat healthily that day and get 2 workouts in, although the second one was shorter than it should have been. Stayed up too late again. ūüė¶

Today, Day 3, I got one very very short workout in! Hung out with a friend for a bit, got all my meals ready to take with me to work tonight and I’ll probably be doing squats or something when I’m not too busy.

I’m checking in on Instagram when I can, and you can see the photos in the sidebar of my blog!

I’m planning on weekly updates for the next 8 weeks of the challenge, but I’ll probably do some midweek posts every so often or whenever I have something to share!

I love the book and the daily mantras and challenges that help me to focus on an aspect of myself that will improve my life and how I see myself. It was a purchase I needed to make.

ETA: I did some research last night and I found a great gym to hit twice weekly when I start my college courses in a couple of weeks! I’m really excited about attending some fitness classes for the first time and meeting new people!

Have a wonderful day and enjoy the rest of your week! Love you guys!



I’ve been kind of frustrated with myself lately because the thoughts running foremost through my mind are about my purpose in this life, and how I need to proceed if I want to make a difference in the world. And those thoughts are not reflected at all by my actions of late. It seems like I’ve come up against an incredibly strong wind, blowing hard against my motivation and willpower to do anything important. Making every step forward seem like an indecent amount of effort. I know what I need to do, it’s just a matter of finding the strength to do it.

Maybe this resistance I’ve suddenly encountered is all the proof I need that I’m on the right track. Let’s keep pushing.

Love Your Body

I’m gonna let you in on a secret: if you’re a girl, Karena and Katrina at Tone It Up are simply brilliant. If you’re a guy, I’m sure you can enjoy them too, but they specifically focus on women’s health and fitness using a fun girlfriend-to-girlfriend approach that makes me feel like I have two¬†great workout partners no matter the weather or how little I feel like getting it done.

I’ve known about them for a year or two, but I started really following along with the fitness challenges and workout routines at the beginning of the year. The current challenge is their Love Your Body challenge combined with 100 miles of cardio by V-Day (or 150 if you want to push yourself further). They post weekly workout schedules, complete with “PM Challenges” to treat yourself and enhance your daily life. They also have monthly calendars with tips and thoughts to help you get your mind to start thinking the way the lifestyle demands.

Continue reading “Love Your Body”

I know I’m not strong enough to be everything that I’m supposed to be…But I will be someday.

A couple of weeks ago, I found this 28-Day Squat Challenge¬†and decided¬†I was going to do it. I actually really like squats, probably because my legs are by far the strongest part of my body and it’s easier to squat than to do a push-up. The added benefit of strengthening my lower body is that I might have better luck shopping for shorts and pants in the future, when I actually have something to fill the butt section of the item.

I’ve started other challenges before; there was a 30-day ab challenge that I tried for a little while before I gave up, and a “sexy legs workout” I did a few times. I did stick with the ab challenge for a while, but I couldn’t keep up with the pace it demanded so I had to cut back and take it more slowly, and I can’t do sit-ups at all without something to hold my feet down, which was a problem at the time (I’ve fractured the same bones in the same foot a few separate times over the last decade, and it was still healing from the most recent injury).

Part of this squat challenge is total dedication to getting the form right before moving on. If you don’t complete the full number of squats on any particular day, or if you do all of the squats but you don’t do them properly, you have to start back at the beginning of that 7-day period. I like that, and I figured that stipulation would be beneficial to stick to when doing the challenge on my own.

I expected the physical strain, and the feelings of procrastination I sometimes get, but¬†these challenges have forced me to acknowledge something else that I wasn’t expecting to have to face: I am a very inconsistent human being. I have had to start week 2 of the challenge on two separate occasions because I forgot to do my squats on one of the days. Last night, I remembered I needed to do them after I was already in bed. I sat for a few minutes that felt like hours, debating on whether I should get up and get them done, or just start the week over tomorrow. And I chose to go to sleep. It bothered me that I was in that position.

Continue reading “I know I’m not strong enough to be everything that I’m supposed to be…But I will be someday.”